With six days till 2020, it really feels like the end of a chapter and the beginning of another brand new page. It didn't feel like Christmas to me yesterday and despite feeling slightly excited for the upcoming Chinese New Year celebrations, the festive moods of Christmas was lost on me. I no longer felt the need to treat myself or receive presents. Perhaps that is a sign of age or growing older. While my friends celebrated Christmas with lavish dinners and exchanged pretty presents with one another, I opted to stay at home. I was contented with spending time alone, doing what I loved with a little piece of quiet, all to myself. It felt right as I settled into the pace of doing some personal reflections and planning ahead of 2020.
I have personal projects lined up for the year 2020 and I can't wait to get started on them. Of course, there will be some priorities and responsibilities along the way. What needs to be done must be done, but I won't allow these complications to halt my personal goals. Somehow, I will find a way.
2019 hasn't been the kindest to me. There have been fruitful moments and not so memorable days. But what is life without some lemon sherbets and vanilla ice cream? (What a strange way to say things.) For me 2019 can be split into a series of phases. Unemployment,idle days of wandering and wondering, mindless worries and anxiety, the passing of my beloved grandmother, busy days working, hectic schedules, feeling suffocated and lost in the present moment, feeling hopeless for the future, having doubts and hesitations, feeling angry, confused and scared at the same time...
Accompanying these turbulent emotions are some unexpected outgrowth: Being more emotionally-conscious,being mindful of my feelings and my surroundings, embracing pain as part of growing, learning that labour and fun are a whole package, rediscovering my love for anime, being more honest with myself, confronting my fears and inner turmoil, being able to discern my true loves and dislikes, establishing my own brand name, investing time and effort in my passion... A lot has happened. For the first time in my life, words alone cannot deliver the complicated emotions when I look back on this year which will soon expire.
There were lots that I learnt throughout this difficult year. But I look forward to the coming year,and this time with unwavering courage and belief that I will be better the next time around. I cannot wait to see my next accomplishments, be it personal growth or improvements in a specific aspect.
I have personal projects lined up for the year 2020 and I can't wait to get started on them. Of course, there will be some priorities and responsibilities along the way. What needs to be done must be done, but I won't allow these complications to halt my personal goals. Somehow, I will find a way.
2019 hasn't been the kindest to me. There have been fruitful moments and not so memorable days. But what is life without some lemon sherbets and vanilla ice cream? (What a strange way to say things.) For me 2019 can be split into a series of phases. Unemployment,idle days of wandering and wondering, mindless worries and anxiety, the passing of my beloved grandmother, busy days working, hectic schedules, feeling suffocated and lost in the present moment, feeling hopeless for the future, having doubts and hesitations, feeling angry, confused and scared at the same time...
Accompanying these turbulent emotions are some unexpected outgrowth: Being more emotionally-conscious,being mindful of my feelings and my surroundings, embracing pain as part of growing, learning that labour and fun are a whole package, rediscovering my love for anime, being more honest with myself, confronting my fears and inner turmoil, being able to discern my true loves and dislikes, establishing my own brand name, investing time and effort in my passion... A lot has happened. For the first time in my life, words alone cannot deliver the complicated emotions when I look back on this year which will soon expire.
There were lots that I learnt throughout this difficult year. But I look forward to the coming year,and this time with unwavering courage and belief that I will be better the next time around. I cannot wait to see my next accomplishments, be it personal growth or improvements in a specific aspect.
Well first, I am envious that you have your own goals and direction to move forward to! Maybe it is true that we Libra (Libran? Libraian? Librarian?) is going through a turbulent phase of changes and it sometimes make us feel small and afraid. Nevertheless I shall look forward to your accomplishments and reflect on mine at the same time. All the best!
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